Marriage is unarguably one of the most important journeys people would walk in their lives. Among all races and communities, there are certain levels or ages in life people are expected to bear babies. Apparently, the community would mount pressure on the fellow to marry and bear children.
In Africa, settling down is golden. A person can attain all the accolades there is in this world, without marrying, such a fellow is nothing in the eyes of the African. Hopefully, the narrative is changing gradually – perhaps.
People marry for many reasons. These reasons take their support from how a fellow sees marriage to be. A renowned lawyer and author in Nigeria, Reno Omokri has revealed what could be the worst reason one will marry.
According to him, marrying shouldn’t be because your mom is ageing and wants to hold her grandchildren before she passes is unimaginable. He stated emphatically that children are not pets. Thus, if your mom wants something to hold before she dies, she can afford pets.
Moreover, he explained that children are humans that need love and support. Therefore, when people have them when they are not ready, they find it difficult to show these qualities to the children.
“The worst reason to marry is because your mother tells you she is getting old and wants to hold her grandkids before she dies. How can you marry for such a flimsy reason? Kids are not dogs or cats. These are humans that need love and support. How can you have children because another person, who won’t be the one to care for them, wants them? That is how you continue the cycle of poverty that has devastated your lineage and then you blame innocent village people. Have children only, only; only when you are ready!” So marriage is not an avenue to have children to please others – not even your parents.
Most of the time, it’s the mothers that mount unsurmountable pressure on their children to bear grandchildren. And always, it’s either they use their ageing as the reason or that of their children. Once the child finishes school and finds something doing, they advise that he or she has to settle down in order to live a meaningful life.